Pesach for Commies

This holiday, like many others in our tradition, is based on a vanquishing war. While the Egyptians allowed us a place in their society, secure jobs and 3 squares a day, we repaid them with 10 plagues, the loss of all of their firstborn, the destruction of their armies and the loss of their hired help. They allowed us to build their cities and to go down in history. It is well known that the Jewish leader had a secret summit with Bush on Mt. Sinai before arriving in Egypt, the land of his birth, the land where he was raised in royal fashion. Now we understand! We declared an adventure war. And like all other wars, the big corporate interests were the main benefactors. Companies, led by Reynolds Corporation, soaked us in the blood of innocent Egyptians, and for WHAT? So that they could increase their bottom line of course, and so they did. But this is not the first time that big foil has used our kids as cannon fodder. Passover has become synonymous with rolls and rolls of the sharp silvery menace, something that the forebears of our people would never have tolerated. It is time for us to double our diligence, to stand together and declare with all of our might, NO BLOOD FOR FOIL!!! NO BLOOD FOR FOIL!!!!! NO BLOOD FOR FOIL!!!!